Just another day...

(see full image)

How does your garden grow?

In my new home, I have a garden. If you know me at all, you know that a garden is the last thing you would expect me to have. When it comes to growing things, I excel at yeast for breads, mold, laundry in the hamper, craft projects, and to-do lists.

In my garden, I have a few small flower beds that are overgrown with weeds. Some weeds were even so pretty that I thought they were flowers. I was told otherwise.

I keep thinking "I ought to get out there and fix up the garden! Maybe plant some herbs (side note: here in the UK, the "h" isn't silent), put in some pretty flowers, maybe a berry bush or some string beans...? Doesn't sound too hard, right? Hah...you're not me. In the words of a common colloquialism here, "I canne' be bothered to do it."

The problem is, I don't have the tools to get out there and pull all the weeds. I don't have the shovels and rakes to aerate or till. I don't have gloves to keep my hands protected. I don't have a means to get to the garden center and buy the seeds and seedlings. And I certainly don't have the wherewithal to know what the heck I'm doing.

So, the weeds continue to grow. The flowers left from the previous tenant continue to cry out for attention, and the dirt sets there...getting dirtier and harder and wishing it had something in it to grow.  And every day I look out my window and think "I should get out there, even for ten minutes, and pull a few weeds." and every day I look out my window and think "you know, those weeds don't look that bad. They're kind of more like wild flowers. Pretty in their own accord. I need to just let them grow and see how pretty they become."

And every day nothing happens except a continued creeping chaos of widespread weeds and dead plants. Except for the rain coming down and the sun coming up, my garden is neglected. Those weeds aren't getting smaller; in fact, they are most prolific in their short life span.

As I look out my window today, I think how amazingly quick a garden bed, so ripe for planting, growing, and feeding, can become a bed of death with weeds choking out the growth; the ground now hardened because of a lack of tending. When I finally work up the courage to step out there and start clearing weeds, tilling ground, and planting seeds, the work will be multiplied because I let it set for so long. It might even be too late in the season for me to start planting some seeds.

I'm sure you know where this is heading.

Because, greater than the garden bed outside my window is the garden that must be tended in my heart, mind, and soul. Sitting there, with soil rich in nutrients to plant it, is a garden bed asking to be tilled, turned, planted, and tended.

In that garden are sweetly smelling flowers of joy, kindness, faithfulness. Bright colored plants of service, humility, encouragement. The growth of love, peace, gentleness, long-suffering. It's where weeds of gossip, discontent, frustration, and idleness can begin to grow. It's also where they can multiply into distrust, anger, bitterness, and hurt. And where I can look out from a window and think "you know, those weeds aren't so bad. They aren't hurting anything right now. I'll just let them grow..." only to find out too late that they are choking the plants to death.

It's where I must spend my quiet time with the Lord...using the spade of the Word, the shovel of prayer, and the gloves of accountability. It's where I need to get my hands dirty, ripping out the roots of those weeds so they don't choke the growth of life. The scary part is how often I don't choose to be in my garden. And how quickly, when that happens, I find one...two...25 more weeds to turn.

This garden, where I could afford to spend more time--instead of just looking at from a window and watch as the weeds start to overtake the growth--is just waiting for me to step inside it and get to work. The greatest part? I won't be out there alone, blindly tearing up soil and plants alike, hoping for the best (much like I will be doing in my physical garden). The Gardener will be with me every step of the way. Showing me what needs to be yanked, what needs to be nurtured, and where I need to start new seeds.

I'm ready to move past stopping and smelling the flowers of others gardens...to planting the flowers that others can stop and smell...and ultimately, I pray, they will desire a garden of their own.

Some verses to meditate on: John 15:1-5, Psalm 1, Isaiah 58:9-11, 2 Timothy 3:16-17, Galatians 5:16-26

Faithful to the End

Mr Shea

As many of you already know, George Beverly Shea went home to be with the Lord this week at 104 years old. His legacy as a gospel singer and the front running musician in Billy Graham’s evangelistic crusades is overshadowed by his commitment of faith in Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior.

And, to be quite honest with you, I had no idea who He was until yesterday when I, coincidentally, also found out of his passing away.

His life touched people worldwide. His ministry spanned the globe and because of His faithfulness to His Savior, people came to know the Lord and their faith grew. His music affected more people than can be counted and His life’s work is still affecting people after his death. Sure, he had his faults and I’m not in any way saying he was perfect. But, he was a saint used by God to further His kingdom. This is a hero in my book. George Beverly Shea penned this song at age 23.

I’d rather have Jesus than silver and gold

I’d rather be His than have riches untold

I’d rather have Jesus than houses or lands

I’d rather be led by His nail pierced hands

Than to be a king of a best domain

And be held in sin’s dread sway

I’d rather have Jesus

Than anything this world affords today

I’d rather have Jesus than worldly applause

I’d rather be faithful to His dear cause

I’d rather have Jesus than worldwide fame

Yes, I’d rather be true to His holy name

He wrote this and offered it’s words to the Lord at age 23. The Lord blessed him with a lifelong ministry. He had worldly applause as a musician, travelled worldwide with Billy Graham, lived a comfortable life (I’m only guessing on this one). But this song says it all: even though he had those things, his heart sang that he would rather have Jesus.

At 104 years old, it can be said that George Beverly Shea was faithful to the end. Like the Parable of the talents, Jesus has looked upon Mr Shea and said "...'Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.' - Matthew 25:21 NKJV

Silas

During our prayer meeting yesterday morning, I also found out about a little boy named Silas who is 4-years old and losing a battle to cancer. The doctors told his parents that it was terminal and he only had weeks to live. His parents, knowing that they had to tell him what was happening, went in and broke the news to him. His response? “Oh good, that means I can go to be with Jesus now.”

This little boy’s faith is unbelievable. He is in pain. He has dealt with this pain for most of his short life. But his response speaks to me louder than the largest Billy Graham revival: I’d rather have Jesus.

He would rather have Jesus than the silver and gold he will probably never have a chance to get on this earth. He would rather have Jesus than the applause of a crowd that he will likely never be in front of. He would rather have Jesus than be here in this life on earth.

This little boy, at age 4 knows that going to heaven and being with His Lord, Maker, and Savior is far greater than anything that this world has to offer. At his precious age, he probably doesn’t even know what this world can try to offer to him yet. And still, as this little boy prepares to go to heaven, his legacy will remain: he was faithful to the end.

I can already hear the Lord telling him "...’'Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.' - Matthew 25:21 NKJV

Mr Shea was 104. Silas is 4. Both were and are faithful in their lives to honor the Lord and live for Him. Both had their eyes on their Savior and trusted in his perfect will for their lives. I pray I would heed both of their examples, learn from their great legacies, and do the same.

Philippians 3 Reflections

"But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness, which [is] from the law, but that which [is] through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith;" - Philippians 3:7-9 NKJV

I'm on the train to Sacramento and have just said "goodbye" to my family in Bakersfield. It was pretty hard and as I sat there trying to get my mind on something else, I decided to try to put a movie on. Only, my computer wasn't working. Neither was my internet so I couldn't even text or talk to someone.

Call me a blockhead, but it took me a good hour to realize that what I truly needed was time with the Lord. So, I sought some solace in the Word. Philippians 3 was up on my computer already, so I started reading it and dwelling on the rich words Paul wrote there. It's one of my favorite books and yet I tend to rush through the first 3 chapters to get to the 4th...my favorite chapter.

But right now, Chapter 3 was just what I needed. I have to say, I haven't reflected much on how Paul had to give so much up in order to follow the Lord's call in his life. In verses 4-6, he explains who he was before knowing the Lord and how they were his identity. But then, just as quickly, he brushes them aside with "but what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ..."

And, after having to say goodbye to my family, pack up my belongings into 5 pieces of luggage, leave behind my church family of 7 years, and step away from familiar in order to follow the Lord's calling to Scotland...what Paul said and the things he did resonated with me.

I tried to re-write what Paul said in my own words (in verses 7-9):

"But these merits and titles I had are nothing compared to what I have in Christ. I chose to rather lose them so I could gain Christ. It’s true, I gave up every pride and every title I had to know Christ Jesus as my Lord. It’s been hard and I have suffered because of it, but in the end that stuff I had to give up was crap compared to what I have been given in Christ: a new identity, a new chance at life. It is nothing I have done or that anyone or anything else has done for me, but what He has done and what I faithfully believe He can do: restore my true righteousness through faith in Him;"

Granted, the difference is that Paul was speaking of what he had to leave behind in his flesh in order to gain salvation in the Lord whilst the stuff I am leaving behind is to start a new chapter in the life the Lord has given to me. 

But the feelings are still there. I can imagine Paul having those reflective fleshly moments of "did I really give all of that up for this life?" "Did I make the right choice?" "I really miss what I had..."

I know that days will come when I will miss my family, familiarity, my church, my community...and the days will come when I will let my flesh wonder about the what-ifs and what-could-have-beens; but Paul's comforting words will remind me of why I pressed forward and moved onward to Scotland...

"Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing [I do], forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 3:12-14 NKJV

And what I do know is that I can't hold on to the life I am leaving being. I have to let it go and boldly step forward into what the Lord has for me. New relationships, new ways of communicating with my family in the states. New fellowship, New emails with updates of what the Lord is doing. New. 

The race has to be run with endurance. Paul knew that. I know this from Paul. Christ reminds me of this and the Spirit comforts me through this. 

This is where joy comes from. Following the Lord. Leaving yesterday where it is and not wishing for it to come back. Staying current with God. Rejoicing in Him. Let's not forget the beginning of this chapter: 

"Finally, my brethren, rejoice in the Lord. For me to write the same things to you [is] not tedious, but for you [it is] safe." - Philippians 3:1

Lasts and Firsts

I can't believe how fast the weeks are moving. 

I leave the Central Coast in a little less than 3 weeks. This means that I am experiencing a lot of "lasts." My last time teaching Sunday School was last Sunday. My last Midweek Kid's Study will be tonight. My last day working in the office at Shoreline is next Wednesday. My last Sunday at Shoreline will be March 10th. Many of you who know me well might be wondering how I am handling this...and the answer is that I am handling it in a good way, with a huge dose of the Lord's mercy. 

There is a difference between having emotion (which is a good thing!) and being emotionally unstable...right? Right! One prayer I've had over the past few months has been that I would keep my eyes on the Lord and not let my girlie/emotional/extroverted/people loving self get too caught up in the "sadness" of what this season could look like. He has been so faithful with this request and I ask that you would all keep praying for that! 

I know the tears will come, and I know the goodbyes will be hard...but in the midst of all of that, I want to keep my eyes on the Lord. It is for Him that I am doing this and by Him that I have the strength and ability to do it. I am reminded of the Lord's gentle exhortation in Mark:

"When He had called the people to Himself, with His disciples also, He said to them, "Whoever desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. "For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel's will save it." Mark 8:34-35 NKJV

And, with the denying of myself and the forsaking of known comforts, I am looking forward to a lot of "firsts". My first time living in another country, my first day to fellowship with the church family at Calvary Motherwell, my first outreach, my first time meeting the other missionaries, my first time meeting brothers and sisters that I will look forward to calling "friend". My first bible study. My first trip to the highlands.

I am so blessed to leave this adventure and season on the central coast for a new one in Scotland!

___

On an entirely unrelated note, I read this devotion last night and it blessed me so much that I wanted to share it once again: Taking The Initiative Against Daydreaming (My Utmost For His Highest, Oswald Chambers).

Waiting, with hope, by faith

This is what I read tonight at my dinner/silent auction fundraiser. It was meant to be just something I spoke but the more time I put into it, the more it became a bit of a blog post so, I thought I would put it on my blog.

Tonight was such a blessing. Each person who came and helped and served and cooked and donated and then turned around and bought stuff to support me....wow! I am so blessed by each of you!!!

~

The dictionary defines waiting as The action of staying where one is or delaying action until a particular time or until something else happens. It implies that you know there is a finish line-and that ultimately, regardless of the journey, whatever is at the finish line is worth it. It is the now you are living in...looking forward to the “then” you are heading to.

It is a means to an end. Waiting in line for the bathroom means that you will ultimately get to use the bathroom. Waiting for your order in the mail leads to having the item that you ordered. Waiting for your paycheck implies you will get paid.

About ten years ago, I heard the word “wait” from the Lord when I was praying about wanting to go to Scotland. For ten years I waited. I proverbially saw the end of the line, so I stood in it and waited. I “placed my Amazon order” and knew the mail was coming. 

But then there’s hope. Hope is defined as A feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen. 

It is the emotion that happens during the waiting period. It is the longed for idea of what comes at the end of the wait. It is the filler between the beginning of the waiting period and the fruition of the end. If we wait without hope, what would stop us from giving up? Just think: you’re standing in line at Disneyland to get onto a ride without the hope of actually getting onto the ride. I don’t know about you, but I would get out of line before I actually got INTO line. 

For ten years, I didn’t just wait, I hoped. I trusted that God knew what He was doing, and I walked with the expectation of His fulfillment. and I hoped in Him. Not just the simple hope of one day being able to move to Scotland, but the hope of knowing the Lord more, learning more about Him, and honoring Him in my every day life. 

This didn’t mean I just sat around and waited for my turn. The same way, we don’t just sit in a chair waiting for a paycheck or wait for the mailman without actually placing an order. I may have been in a line waiting to get to a destination, but I wasn’t going to waste that time.

I hoped in the Lord through bible college, working with the youth group and missions trips to Africa and Romania. I hoped in the Lord through heartache, giving up jobs I loved, and through multiple moves (12 times in 8 years!). I hoped in Him through every UP and every DOWN. 

In the past 10 years, I have learned so much. I have grown so much. I have experienced so much. Going to Scotland may have been the “wait”, but the “everything-in-between” was the hope.

The biblical definition of hope comes from a word that means “expect” “tarry”, “look eagerly for”. I have walked through these past ten years expecting to find the Lord. I endured through every hard trial looking eagerly for His face in it. I tarried (delayed, stayed longer) through every adventure knowing the Lord would show up for the celebration.

We can spend our life waiting for the “next best thing” to happen to us...and never actually get there. We can wait for something amazing to occur...and never see it happen. Or we can hope. We can live with a hope of knowing that we were meant for more than just living our lives every day waiting for something to happen. 

So we wait with hope, but this hope is pointless without faith. The bible defines faith in Hebrews 11:1: "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." 

Faith is not having to see the finish line to start the race. You know it’s there...but all you see ahead of you is the road you have to run. My faith in Jesus Christ is the ultimate substance of hope. Regardless of what may have transpired over the past ten or so years, I knew that Scotland was not my ultimate goal. Following Jesus as my Lord is the ultimate goal in life.

"Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only [that], but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us. For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." - Romans 5:1-8 NKJV

The Promises of the Lord

"For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us. Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and has anointed us is God, who also has sealed us and given us the Spirit in our hearts as a guarantee." 

2 Corinthians 1:20-22

I want to share this verse with you. It is from 2 Corinthians and Paul (from my meager understanding) is using it to explain that the only constant and true thing we can rely on is the Lord. He had wanted to go to visit the Corinthian church but couldn't and because of that, they were upset and thought he was unreliable. Paul exhorts them to understand that, had it been up to him, he would have come, but God, in His infinite wisdom and knowledge, allowed for other circumstances and didn't allow him to travel to Corinth.

Paul was affected by a God who's promises are fulfilled in His Son, Jesus Christ. He was human and his "yes" and "no" mean nothing more than "maybe" and "maybe not". But God, through Christ, can say "yes!" and "no!" and we must truly know and submit to that. He wanted the Corinthians to grasp this, too.

And still, today, He is asking me to understand this wisdom as well.

The first time the Lord brought the above verse to my attention was about 3 years ago in church on a Sunday. I still remember where I was sitting and what was going on in my head. The Lord had just opened a door for me to go to Scotland and I still hadn't shared it with more than a handful of people.

I was still in shock that the Lord's goodness would trickle down to me - that, after all I had gone through that year, I could still hear His clear, perfect, and true voice. I was still also very unsure about the fact He was finally sending me over to Scotland. And then we read the above verse.

All of His promises are YES. 

I was so overwhelmed by His clear voice, yet again. "Erika, I promised you Scotland. That means YES. That means AMEN. That means that, even though you may not see the fruition at that moment, it is already done. Yes. Amen. And, yet, I still hadn't completely understood the meaning of the verse.

And then, three years later, the same thing.

You see, even though I am overjoyed at the Lord's calling me to Scotland, I am also incredibly scared. I go to sleep sometimes and think "whoa, am I really doing this? Is this happening?" Or, I take one more administrative step towards leaving and wonder "is this right? Lord, is this what you want me to do?"

I don't feel as equipped as I did even 1 year ago. I don't feel as energetic as I did 3 years ago. I don't feel as confident as I did 5 years ago.

But God, in His infinite wisdom, Has turned merciful eyes on me and said "Erika, YES." And, more than that, He showed me another part of this verse...

"...to the glory of God through us." This is HIS timing, HIS promise, HIS time to shine. With me in the way, He wouldn't get the glory. But because I know that nothing in me is good-that all goodness comes from above-He can now shine.

YES and AMEN. Ten years of waiting, seeking, and hoping. YES. Ten years of doubting, wondering, and dreaming. AMEN.

This promise of being sent as a missionary to Scotland was one made to me by a heavenly Father who seeks to bestow upon us every good and perfect gift. (James 1:17). Know that His gifts to you will be so different-and so perfect for you. And they will all stem from the same truths found in the bible. 

And, I want to encourage you, we can know nothing of the Lord unless we seek to find Him. Read the bible, spend time listening to Him and praying to Him. Without that, how will you know what He desires of you? If what you think you are hearing from God does not line up with Scripture, then it isn't from Him. Let the desires of your heart be His desires. All these things will be added to you.

God's promises are all throughout scripture. Unless we open it up and look, we will never know them and see them come to fruition in our lives.

""But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day [is] its own trouble." - Matthew 6:33-34 NKJV (said to the multitudes. When we seek first His kingdom and righteousness, He promises to provide for us all our earthly needs: specifically food, drink, and clothing.) 

""Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, "teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, [even] to the end of the age." Amen." - Matthew 28:19-20 NKJV (given to the disciples. When we obey His call to share salvation with others, He will be with us always.) 

""No man shall [be able to] stand before you all the days of your life; as I was with Moses, [so] I will be with you. I will not leave you nor forsake you. "Be strong and of good courage, for to this people you shall divide as an inheritance the land which I swore to their fathers to give them. ... "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God [is] with you wherever you go."" - Joshua 1:5-6, 9 NKJV (given to Joshua. God promised to be with him no matter what.) 

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths." - Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV (When we trust in Him and lean on His understandings, acknowledging Him in our ways, He will direct our paths.)

These are just some of my favorite promises of the Lord. What are some promises of the Lord that speak to you? Open up scriptures for yourself and see what else you may find. I would love to hear some in the comments!